Michael Lee Stallard

Everyone experiences difficult seasons in life. Although storms come to our lives in many different forms including health problems, death of a loved one, divorce or job loss, one thing is certain: it’s difficult, if not impossible, to get through the stormy seasons in life alone. We need family and friends who “have our backs.” Unfortunately, as this thoughtful article that recently appeared in USA Today suggests, true friendship may be dying.

In a video interview I filmed for the Leader to Leader Institute’s Leadership Dialogues website, I speak with leadership experts Mark Thompson and  Bonita Buell-Thompson about what I learned from my wife Katie’s successful battles with breast and advanced ovarian cancer. You can read about it and watch the video at this link.

The lesson I learned is about the importance of connection and relationships.  It applies to organizations as much as it does to individuals and families. When difficult seasons arrive, an organization’s culture often makes a difference to whether the organization survives or doesn’t. Dog-eat-dog or cultures that are indifferent to people and relationships often spiral down into relational isolation, anxiety, distrust, blame and finger pointing. On the other hand, Connection Cultures that value human beings and relationships tend to pull together and work through the challenges.

My question for you is, who has your back in life and at work? Are you intentional about taking the time to build strong relationships with individuals who you trust and who trust you? If you lead an organization, do you invest time to develop relationship excellence in your organization?

Some of you know that in addition to speaking and teaching leadership at business, government and academic organizations, Jason Pankau and I frequently speak in faith communities such as churches. (Speaking of churches, here’s a great example of a Connection Culture in a church.  The example comes from Gary Hamel’s MIX blog and it’s about “Mission Shaped Communities” started in England by a number of innovative clergy including my own pastor Drew Williams who is now senior pastor of Trinity Church in Greenwich, Connecticut.)

To learn more about Connection Cultures in faith communities, watch the following video series of Jason Pankau teaching a workshop on Connection Cultures for Churches.

Session 1 – The Case for Connection
Session 2 – Creating a Connection Culture
Session 3 – Inspiring Identity
Session 4 – Knowledge Flow
Session 5 – Committed Members and Servant Leaders

The US Navy and U2 in the same article! Huh?

That’s right.  It’s true. Check it out for yourself.

The Leader to Leader Institute just posted an article on its website that Jason Pankau and I wrote for the Summer edition of the Leader to Leader Journal. The article features the stories of the US Navy’s former Chief of Naval Operations (CNO) Admiral Vern Clark, and Bono, the lead singer of the rock band U2.  The article is about the topic of connecting with “core employees” to boost strategic alignment, employee engagement, productivity and innovation.  Here is a link to the article entitled “To Boost Performance, Connect with the Core.” Read more »

This weekend, my wife Katie and I went for a rare getaway to Boston, about a three hour drive from our home in Connecticut.   Our primary interest was to see the home of the Adams family, not of the television sitcom fame, however. We were interested in seeing the other Adams family, John and Abigail Adams, and their son John Quincy Adams.  Katie and I much admire the Adams’s for their character, their faith and the positive impact they had America.

As it turned out, Sunday was the birthday of John Quincy Adams.  When we visited the tombs of the Adams’s we saw a wreath on John Quincy Adam’s tomb sent from President Obama.

The highlight of the trip for me was seeing the Mendi Bible that was given by the Mendi men to John Quincy Adams in thanks for representing them in their successful case to win their freedom, a case that went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court.  The Mendi Bible is kept in a safe except on the weekend of John Quincy Adams’s birthday when it is on display in the Adams’s library adjacent to their home in Quincy, Massachusetts.

The tour guide let me read a copy of the letter the Mendi Men presented to John Quincy Adams at the time they gave him the Bible. The letter expressed their gratitude to President Adams, how much the Bible meant to them during their time in prison and how they continue reading it now that they are free. President Adams wrote back to the Mendi that “it was from that book that I learnt to espouse your cause when you were in trouble.”

The story of the Mendi men was captured in Stephen Spielberg’s highly acclaimed movie “Amistad,” which I encourage you to see.   In 2007, Deval Patrick, Massachusett’s first African-American governor, was sworn in using the Mendi Bible (you can read about it in this Boston Globe article.)

Near the church where the Adams’s are entombed, there is a statue of young John Quincy at around nine years old holding the hand of his mother Abigail.  She was a remarkable woman of faith, wisdom and courage.  Knowing the stories of John and Abigail Adams it should come as no surprise that their son went on to become America’s sixth president and later a defender of liberty and justice in the case of the Mendi’s.  As historian David McCullough wrote,

“While there are indeed great, often unfathomable forces in history before which even the most exceptional of individuals seem insignificant, the wonder is how often events turn upon a single personality, or the quality we call character.”

The Adams’ family was a tremendous example of strength of character in action.  I was encouraged learning more about them.

Learning about and celebrating the stories of individuals who have good character is one way we can be encouraged to live up to their example. By developing habits that reflect strength of character in our lives and teaching the stories of role models such as the Adams’s to our children we help them develop good character too.

Jason Pankau and I were recently guests on LeaderLab’s podcast interviews available online or at iTunes. LeaderLab’s podcasts are hosted by David Burkus. David’s past guests on LeaderLab’s podcasts have included Marshall Goldsmith, Daniel Pink and Steve Farber. Check it out.

With the recent firing of General McChrystal as commander of American forces in Afghanistan over his insubordination, I thought it would be an ideal time to reproduce here what I wrote in Fired Up or Burned Out about one of the greatest military leaders in history, America’s Army Chief of Staff, General George C. Marshall.

Marshall created a culture that stands in stark contrast to the culture created by General McChrystal as reported in a Rolling Stone magazine article entitled “The Runaway General.” Defenders of McChrystal argue he was speaking truth to power.  General Marshall was known for speaking truth to power but, unlike McChrystal, he recognized the need to respect legitimate authority and to always be respectful in dealing with the people he interacted with whether they were fellow soldiers, diplomats or representatives of foreign governments.

Because Marshall possessed humility of character, he knew that he was not always right and had to defer to the decisions of his superior in the chain-of-command then put extra effort into executing such decisions. As a result, Marshall had the complete confidence of the leaders he reported to such as General John “Blackjack” Pershing and President Franklin Deleno Roosevelt.

Marshall should be one of the role models all leaders strive to emulate. The title of the chapter I wrote about General Marshall was  ”Soldier of Peace.”  You can read it below.

Read more »

Below is the text of an article Jason Pankau and I wrote for the Leader to Leader Journal that uses examples of CNO Admiral Vern Clark of the US Navy and Bono of he rock band U2.   Read more »

John Robert Wooden, the legendary basketball coach, died yesterday. He was 99 years old. This morning I read Wooden’s obituaries in The New York Times and the Associated Press and felt they missed important aspects of his story that reflect the essence of the man and his legacy.

I profiled Wooden as a role model who we can all learn from in my book Fired Up or Burned Out.  Wooden’s favorite saying was “a life not lived for others is a life not lived.”  He said his heroes were his father Joshua Wooden, Abraham Lincoln and Mother Theresa, each of whom lived a life of service to others.  In John Wooden’s honor, I’m posting the following excerpts from my book:

Connection and the Legend

So often in life, good things bloom from the seeds of hardship. The personal character of a young teenager who went on to become a great leader was immeasurably shaped during the Depression when his family lost their farm in Indiana. His father’s reaction to the loss was unusual. He wasn’t bitter about it. Instead, his dad focused on the future and told his children that everything would be all right. And it was.

During those impressionable years in this leader’s life, he learned that, like the Depression, some things in life are not in our control. His father taught him that he should always strive to do his best at anything he chose to do and not worry about the outcome. He would later spread that philosophy to countless other.

Another perspective he gained during those formative years was to value people. By watching his mom and dad and hearing the stories of faith they taught him, he learned the joy that came from making people and relationships his focus in life.

The young boy grew up to be an outstanding high school and college basketball player in a state that was rabid about the game. After college he married Nell, the love of his life and the only woman he had ever dated. He taught high school English and coached basketball until 1943 when he enlisted to serve in the Navy during World War II. When he returned from the war to the high school in South Bend, Indiana, where he previously taught, he was offered his old job. Other returning GIs were not, however, and so he refused the offer because he felt it was wrong for the school to deny veterans the jobs they had left to serve their country. Instead, he accepted an offer to become athletic director and head basketball coach at Indiana State Teachers College.

A Caring Coach

For the 1946-47 season Indiana State received a post-season invitation to the National Association of Intercollegiate Basketball (NAIB) national play-offs. After the coach learned that a young African-American, second-string guard on his team, Clarence Walker, would not be allowed to participate in the tournament because of the color of his skin, he declined the offer. Read more »

Jason Pankau and I are presenting a 60 minute webinar for Communitelligence about the “Connection Edge” that leaders such as Steve Jobs, Ed Catmull and A.G. Lafley employ to boost strategic alignment and employee engagement.  The webinar will be held on June 9 at 2:00 PM Eastern.  You can sign up at this link.

At the Chick-fil-A Leadercast, Jim Collins just pointed out that great leaders in his research had the character strength of humility and those who fall could be described as having hubris. Collins is right.  The Greek historian Heroditus who is referred to as the “father of history” warned his fellow Athenians of developing hubris in his great work The Persian Wars. Heroditus described how king Darius the Great of Persia showed hubris in attacking the small Greek City-State of Athens.  Although the Athenians were overwhelmingly outnumbered,  they routed the Persians. And years later when Darius’ son Xerxes tried to avenge his father’s humiliation, the Athenian’s defeated the Persians again.

Collins also pointed out that so often a crucible in life — cancer, economic depression, emotional depression, death of a loved one, etc. — shape people’s character so that hubris is replaced by humility.  Collins wife’s battles with breast cancer helped him understand this.  I know from my own experience how fear of losing the love of your life from something that’s out of your control develops a sense of humility.  My wife Katie’s battles with breast and advanced ovarian cancer taught me this (I wrote about the experience in essay for Amazon Shorts entitled “Alone No Longer” that is widely circulated in healthcare communities.)

There are some great books that touch on how struggles in life affect the character of leaders.  One of my favorites is Lincoln’s Melancholy by my friend Joshua Wolf Shenk.  I also highly recommend the enthralling and inspiring Bonhoeffer: Pastor,  Martyr, Prophet, Spy — A Righteous Gentile Versus the Third Reich by Eric Metaxas.