Michael Lee Stallard

Last Thursday my wife and I attended the premiere of the new documentary Full Battle Rattle produced and directed by Tony Gerber and Jesse Moss. The documentary is about the U.S. Army’s billion dollar simulated Iraq in California’s Mojave Desert, complete with hundreds of exiles playing civilians and insurgents, terrorist suspects, grieving mothers, and innocent shopkeepers.  It’s an extraordinary work that gives the viewer a very real sense of the challenges faced by an occupying force in a foreign land.  A.O. Scott just reviewed the film for The New York Times. Here’s a clip about the movie from CNN.
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My blog is primarily about Connection Cultures in the workplace and how they increase employee engagement.  Connection is even more important at home.  I’ve had several friends who were so swept up in their careers that they ignored and lost connection with their spouses. Their lives drifted apart and their marriages soon ended in divorce.  

Maureen Dowd at The New York Times wrote a gem of an article entitled “An Ideal Husband” that infers the importance of relational connection in marriage.  There’s a lot of wisdom in this article.  I’ll be reading it soon to my two teenage daughters.   

It’s wise to begin your day on a positive note by saying “good morning” to your colleagues at work.  Failing to recognize them is to communicate indifference.  It’s also wise to begin every meeting with a positive comment.  Research has shown that beginning a meeting with a positive comment makes group participants better listeners and makes the group more constructive.  These benefits of starting your day and meetings off on a positive note are consistent with the findings of Professor Barbara Frederickson’s research on positive emotions.

I learned the foregoing from my friend Alex Kjerulf.  Check out his Chief Happiness Officer blog and his book entitled Happy Hour is 9 to 5: Learn How to Love Your Job, Love Your Life and Kick Butt at Work. 

Years ago when I attended a large church in Wheaton, Illinois, I remember the Asgedom family who came from a refugee camp in Sudan.  They were ever present members of our church community.  Mawi Asgedom was a young boy at that time.  I recently learned that Mawi went on to graduate cum laude from Harvard in 1999 and was voted by his fellow students to be one of the Harvard’s four commencement speakers.  

Standing before an audience of 30,000 Mawi gave a remarkable speech entitled  ”Of Snakes, Butterfies and Small Acts of Kindness.”  Read more »

Nelson Mandela recently celebrated his 90th birthday. I’m grateful for this man and the wisdom of his example. When he entered Robben Island Prison he was known for confronting his enemies. When he was released 27 years later, Mandela stunned South Africans with his magnanimous behavior toward former adversaries.  Read more »

Here is another post merger trap organizations would be wise to avoid following a merger or acquisition.

The Exclusivity Trap.  Too many leaders fail to keep all the employees they are responsible for leading in the loop.  Instead, they tend to keep a smaller, more exclusive group involved in the conversations about important business issues. The problem is that most individuals want to be informed about issues that are important to them, have a voice to share their opinions and ideas, and be certain that their input is considered before decisions are made. When people are in the loop, it helps meet their needs for respect, recognition and belonging.  When they are not in the loop, they are naturally anxious and tend to fear the worst.

Leaders are wise to regularly meet with all the employees they are responsible for leading to share information about issues that are important to them, ask for their ideas and opinions, and then consider them before making decisions.  Obviously leaders will not be able to do this with every issue.  The leader who keeps all employees in the conversation about issues important to them, however, will be rewarded when employees put more effort in their work because they feel a sense of ownership in achieving the results. 

In this series of posts I’m identifying the traps that I warn leaders to avoid when they are involved in mergers or acquisitions.  Each of the traps I identify affect employee engagement.  By avoiding the traps leaders will also help develop the Connection Culture that all organizations need to achieve sustainable superior performance.

The Superiority Trap.  In all mergers, one party usually feels superior in status and reputation to the other. The subordinate party’s employees are likely to be hypersensitive to this status gap. Managers from the dominant organization who act the slightest bit condescending will offend employees from the subordinate organization.  These employees will be less likely to cooperate with members of the dominant organization.   On the other hand, managers from the dominant organization who look for ways to affirm their new colleagues and show that they have confidence and high expectations for their future performance will be rewarded when their new colleagues live up to their aspirations.

Check out a wonderful column in today’s The New York Times written by one of my favorite journalists, Joe Nocera.  The column is entitled, “The Sinatra of Southwest Feels the Love.” In it Nocera contrasts the sober atmosphere at American Airlines annual meeting in Dallas this last Wednesday morning to the lovefest at Southwest Airlines annual meeting that commenced a couple hours later across town.  The article focuses on Southwest’s co-founder Herb Kelleher and his belief that treating your employees well provides a competitive edge.  Nocera shares his observations about Kelleher and explores other possible reasons for Southwest’s success.  Like everything Nocera writes, it’s an enjoyable read with thought-provoking observations and insight.   

Over at Steve Roesler’s “All Things Workplace” blog, he posted a wonderful video about the power of connection to heal. Check it out.

In honor of Mother’s Day tomorrow, I am taking a break from writing about connection at work to focus on connection in families. Each of us experience times in life when we feel disconnected from family members. The lack of relational intimacy with the people we love can be especially painful. It often contributes to unhealthy behaviors as a means to cope with the pain. In the stories of individuals who break their addiction, you will nearly always find one person or a group of people who helped heal the wounds of the addicted with love and encouragement.

Lost & Found is the poignant story of Kathryn Slattery, a contributing editor of Guideposts magazine and author of several books. In the book, Kitty describes her disconnection with her mother and father, the onset of bulimia, how her husband Tom’s love and encouragement helped her overcome bulimia, and finally how Kitty reconnected with her parents.

I enjoyed this book. Read more »