Category Archives: Connection Culture

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With Connection, Different Strokes for Different Folks

#7  Different Strokes for Different Folks  – This phrase from the past is true when it comes to connection.  People have different predispositions when it comes to their sensitivities to feeling connection or its absence.  People also respond differently to actions in terms of whether it makes them feel connected or not.  Learn about each person and tailor your behaviors to connect based on what you’ve learned about them.  Recognize that it may take time before you get it right. (This practice reflects the Connection Culture elements of Vision, Value and Voice.)

This is the seventh post in our series entitled “100 Ways to Connect.” The series highlights language, attitudes and behaviors that help you connect with others.  Although the language, attitudes and behaviors focus on application in the workplace, you will see that they also apply to your relationships at home and in the community.

 

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Neutralize “Killer Stress” to Boost the Bottom Line

Who experiences greater levels of stress: management or employees? Managers seem to think they do, but hard research data makes it clear: Employees experience greater stress, and that affects the company’s bottom line.

It doesn’t have to be that way: Effective leaders can create an organizational culture that reduces “killer stress” and encourages “challenge stress,” which produces gains in productivity and performance.

Despite its reputation, all stress is not bad. What we call “challenge stress,” actually stimulates people to perform at their best.

“Killer stress,” is the kind that comes from feeling like you don’t have control over your work. Killer stress is unhealthy and in many individuals triggers fight, flight, freeze or stalking behavior — not what good leaders want to find in their organizations.

Here are three actions you can take to reduce killer stress, increase challenge stress and boost your company’s bottom line. 

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Seek the Unique

#6  Seek the Unique  – When meeting someone for the first time, ask questions to identify something that is both unique and positive about them.  Doing this will make you more likely to remember them and what differentiates them from others.

While teaching a leadership seminar in Boston, a participant from the American Red Cross told me that Elizabeth Dole, the former president of the Red Cross, practiced this and Ms. Dole frequently brought up in conversation what was unique about a person the next time she saw him/her. (This practice reflects the Connection Culture element of Value.)

This is the sixth post in our series entitled “100 Ways to Connect.” The series highlights language, attitudes and behaviors that help you connect with others.  Although the language, attitudes and behaviors focus on application in the workplace, you will see that they also apply to your relationships at home and in the community.

 

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Assessing Ballmer’s Leadership

Check out technology critic David Pogue’s “How Ballmer Missed the Tidal Shifts in Tech” which appeared on the New York Times’ website on August 24.

I believe the most relevant question to ask in assessing Ballmer’s leadership and why Microsoft missed the tidal shifts in tech is: did Ballmer and his leadership team develop a culture of control, a culture of indifference or a “connection culture?” (These are the three types of psychosocial cultures in organizations.) Connection Cultures are required to maximize innovation, employee engagement and productivity, a case we made in our book Fired Up or Burned Out: How to Reignite Your Team’s Passion, Creativity and Productivity. 

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Say “Hi” and “Bye”

#5 Say Hi and Bye

When you enter a room and it’s appropriate given the context and number of people present, greet people by name.  When you leave their presence, say goodbye.  Not saying hi and/or bye, runs the risk of giving someone the impression that you are indifferent to them.  (This practice reflects the Connection Culture element of Value.)

This is the fifth post in our series entitled “100 Ways to Connect.” The series highlights attitudes and behaviors that help you connect with others.  Although the attitudes and behaviors focus on application in the workplace, you will see that they also apply to your relationships at home and in the community.

Update: Howard Behar, former President of Starbucks North America and Starbucks International, and I co-authored an article entitled “Leadership Myopia” that appears in the August edition of Leadership Excellence alongside articles by well known leadership experts Gary Hamel, Marshall Goldsmith and Patrick Lencioni.    On October 10, I will give a keynote speech at the Retailing Summit held in Dallas, Texas.  The Retailing Summit is a premiere event for senior leaders in retail.  This year’s conference includes Karen Katz, President and CEO of Nieman Marcus, Maxine Clark, Founder of Build-a-Bear Workshop, Duncan Mac Naughtan, EVP, Chief Merchandising & Marketing Officer for Wal-Mart U.S. and Graham Atkinson, CMO & Chief Experience Officer of Walgreens.

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Neuro Wi-Fi: Power of Mutual Empathy

Happy Girl
#4 Feel Others’ Emotions

Mutual empathy is a powerful connector that is made possible by the mirror-neurons in our brains. These neurons act like an emotional Wi-Fi system. When we feel the emotions others feel it makes them feel connected to us. When we feel their positive emotions, it enhances the positive emotions they feel. When we feel their pain, it diminishes the pain they feel. If someone expresses emotion, it’s okay, and natural, for you to feel it.

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THANK YOU PFIZER for Saving 800,000 Children’s Lives

A recent announcement by Pfizer caught my attention.  The firm is selling its Prevnar 13 vaccine at a fraction of its normal price so that 260 million young children in poor countries will be protected from pneumonia and meningitis.  This is a disease that kills 800,000 children annually, nearly all of whom live in poor countries according to the World Health Organization.  800,000 children!  As a father myself, I think not only of all of those children’s lives but also the heartbreak, trauma and suffering that their families will avoid.  This is truly something worthy of celebrating and I for one want to say “thank you, Pfizer.”

I hope the leaders at Pfizer make their employees and the family members of employees well aware of this because they  should feel proud of their company for alleviating the suffering and deaths that would have otherwise visited these children and their families.  Communicating the good deeds of an organization reflects Vision and Value, two of the three core elements of a Connection Culture that boosts employee engagement, productivity, innovation and overall performance.

The news media today provide a constant drum beat of of stories about corporate misdeeds and rightfully so because the press plays an important accountability role in free market democracies.  I do wish, however, that the press would give more attention to positive stories like this that reflect good corporate character and reduce time spent on trivial matters.  Corporations bring skilled people together and provide the capital and resources necessary to solve some of the most challenging problems facing humankind.  Pfizer’s action in this announcement is a great example.  By celebrating the good deeds of corporations like Pfizer, we encourage them to be good citizens.

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Attention is Oxygen for Relationships

#2 Be Present in Conversations

It’s been said that attention is oxygen for relationships. When interacting with people, be present in conversations. Get in the habit of staying focused on them and giving them your full attention. Be engaged and curious by asking questions and then asking follow-up questions to clarify. Listen carefully to words and observe facial expressions and body cues. Don’t check your smart phone, don’t look at your watch, don’t look around the room or let your mind wander.

Want to learn more? Watch the video above as Katharine P. Stallard shares tips for being present.

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French Hero of the American Revolution

LafayetteVersallis

Since today is Bastille Day, I’m posting the chapter from Fired Up or Burned Out entitled “French Hero of the American Revolution.”  The subject of the chapter, Lafayette, was a key figure in both the American and French revolutions, and by his action he helped create and sustain Connection Cultures where cultures of dominance or indifference formerly existed.

French Hero of the American Revolution

Visiting historical sites in the state of Virginia, you might be surprised to see recurring tributes to a Frenchman whose name and story remain unknown to most Americans today. At Monticello, Thomas Jefferson’s hilltop home near Charlottesville, you’ll find a portrait and sculpted bust of the Frenchman. At Mount Vernon, George Washington’s home on the Potomac River, you’ll learn that Washington thought of him as a son, and you will find the key to the Bastille on display, sent by the Frenchman to Washington after he ordered the notorious Paris prison torn down during the French Revolution. Perhaps most surprising of all, in the Hall of Presidents beneath the rotunda of the Virginia capitol where a statue of George Washington and busts of the other seven Virginia-born presidents reside, you’ll find a bust of the Frenchman who was neither a president nor born in Virginia.